If you are wondering why you haven’t heard much from me, I have been focusing on resting, recuperating and getting better. It’s a long and slow process but I do finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Ever felt exhausted to your core than you can’t do your normal activities? You can’t even exercise or read like you enjoy. I would describe my burnout like that.
It’s not that I don’t enjoy my career, my colleagues and my workload. It just became too much.
What is Burnout for me
COVID-19 accelerated the process for me. My job required extra vigilant and extra work initially at the beginning of the pandemic. I wasn’t able to rest, recuperate as I needed. I was also on high alert, scared of catching that virus. I was scared of the unknown. Therefore, my body reacted by freezing. I couldn’t function anymore. I also started getting physical signs of fatigue and exhaustion. I couldn’t concentrate anymore, I was so tired. I didn’t have any desire to socialize or go out with friends or family. I got weird sensations on my left side of my face. Those symptoms really had me scared that I was having a stroke. I spoke to my doctor and we decided I needed time off to concentrate on myself, my health and to get better.
Reading Anne Berubé’s The Burnout Antidote made me realize that I can be in a burnout state while still loving what I do and the life I have. It doesn’t necessarily mean I need to change my life. I just need to care for myself differently, change the way I show up.
How I am living with the burnout
Possibly easier said than done since I’ve been struggling for many months but I’m determined to embrace this fragile and vulnerable side and continue to live the best way I can. There’s no use being pessimist or negative.
Better to focus on all the positive in my life. I do have a boss, colleagues, friends and family that love me and support me. That for me is priceless. It’s the most important part of my recovery and recuperation, knowing I have loving and caring support. I’m not alone.
I also sought professional help in order to further understand my condition but also to help me advance in my journey. I refuse to be stuck and frozen. I want to keep moving toward a healthy version of myself.
Today, a healthy version of myself means prioritizing living a sustainable healthy lifestyle. A good night sleep, whole foods diet, exercise regularly and continuously listening to my body. It’s not always easy since I have to put boundaries where I didn’t in the past. A boundary that is harder for me is limiting spending time with toxic individuals that drain my energy.
I’ve noticed that my life has improved in the last few weeks and I want to think it’s because of the positive steps I take to care for myself.
What have you been doing to keep healthy? To maintain your equilibrium during this pandemic?
I’d love to hear from you and connect. You can find me on Instagram (equilibrium.love) or on Facebook (Equilibrium - mental wellness).
In Love and Light 💕💫
Nat